"You have a camel toe”
or “I can see your vagina in that"
If you have a vulva, it might be visible through tight clothing. You can’t make it invisible.
You could try responding with “Yes I know” or “You’re making me feel uncomfortable” – talking about someone else’s genitals is not OK.
“I’ve seen other vulvas in real life and yours looks different”
All vulvas are different, so yours won’t look exactly like the other ones they’ve seen in real life. Vulvas are like faces – there won’t be another one that looks the exact same as yours! So why would somebody say your vulva is abnormal or ‘weird’? They might just think it’s a funny thing to say – even though it's not – or perhaps they're insecure and looking to make someone else feel the same way.
You could try responding with: “Of course not, because they’re all different.” Or: “It’s unacceptable for you to make me feel bad about myself”.
“What’s that hanging thing?” or “It shouldn’t be hanging”
They’re probably talking about your inner labia extending below the outer labia, which is rarely shown in porn, so people don’t realise that 50% of women have vulvas with visible inner labia.
You could try responding with: “This is just what a vulva looks like in real life.” You could also tell them to do their own research into what labia are. If they can search for porn, it’s not that hard to search for the truth.
“That vulva is ugly”
When this insult is thrown around it could make people feel ashamed but it isn't a reflection of what your vulva looks like – it’s a general fear and disgust instilled by society.
You could try responding with: “You need to grow up.” Or: “You should educate yourself.”
You could even point them in the direction of this website. Whether they have a vagina of their own or not, nobody should think vulvas are ugly – it’s time for everybody to learn the truth.
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